How many high school sweethearts stay together
Finding yourself with a significant other of any kind in high school is an exciting accomplishment. To actually spend extended time with that person is to get to know them more than just how they look on the outside, which can often be the only aspect that high schoolers care about. Some may take the years and outward appearances into account when they make their decision to divorce. Rarely do people look the same way they did when they were in high school.
Human metabolisms and natural aging simply are not built that way, and so when a couple who dated in high school decides to marry in their 20s , they face a great deal of risk for future divorce. Researchers at the Institute for Family Studies found that a couple that marries at age 25 is over 50 percent less likely to get divorced than a couple who marries at age The economic stability of having an established job coincides with being in a long-term relationship, giving you solid ground as you enter into the union at an older age.
There is a perception that associates high school sweethearts getting married with an older generation, and there is data that supports that notion. According to Business Insider , there were a higher number of people in their 20s who saw their marriage end in and in than in Divorce rates for those within the first ten years of marriage for a high school sweetheart were at 54 percent and were much higher than the average American couple at 32 percent, according to Brandon Gaille Marketing.
Today, the trend toward marriages while the couple is still in high school or soon after high school are diminishing. An unexpected pregnancy can put a real stress on a young couple just starting out their life together. Another surprising statistic is that only 22 percent of partners who marry in high school or shortly thereafter both even finish college. In high school, most of us just want to fit in.
Being in a relationship in high school makes us feel more confident and worthy in those years of vulnerability. High school sweethearts who make it past 10 years usually stay together longer than average couples. When we are in high school, we are usually with classmates that are pretty much in our socio-economic group. Of course, there are always those on the fringes…either wealthier than most of the others or at the lower end of the economic spectrum.
I grew up in the middle class and had strong family, religious and social support systems in place. But still, there was much life that I had not experienced outside of that bubble. Today, teenagers seem more sophisticated and aware of the world even though they may still have limited life experiences. My ex-spouse had pretty much the same background and life experience. So that gave us many things in common to start a relationship.
We both knew how strong, solid relationships worked. Our primary families were intact. We thought ours would be, too. In our work with primarily midlife and late life divorce, many of the men and women going through divorce are in their 40s, 50s, 60s and up. That is the only divorce demographic that is still on the rise.
During marriage, people change. What is interesting about divorce rates amongst marriages is that those who tend to live in areas that would be defined as American liberal tend to have lower rates of divorce.
Religion, age, and location all play roles, but one fact cannot be denied: those who marry their high school sweethearts tend to have happy marriages, even if they end up in divorce for some reason. Only 1 out of 5 people who marry their high school sweethearts even get to college, no matter what their age happens to be when they get married.
The real problem with looking at high school sweetheart relationships is that the data on these relationships is relatively limited. Even the data that does exist tends to be slanted in some way. For liberal magazines, using this as a specific example, the information is slanted to counter conservative claims about marriage. Data gathered by data websites is spun in such a way that using the website itself is promoted as a positive. Whether expenses, technical difficulties with communicating or simple misunderstandings are involved, these and many more factors can put a strain on your well-being as a couple and as an individual.
What about when personal issues come into play? Long-distance relationships can breed jealousy, distrust and arguments. No matter how long two people have known each other, distance can drastically change their feelings for one another. Because of insecurities or general distrust, it is not uncommon for long-distance relationships to end badly.
In the long run, it might even be better for the relationship to break up. Most alarming of all the cons of dating your high school sweetheart in college is the one that argues the relationship keeps your mind at home while you should be developing independence. College is a time to experiment with your personality, values and interests. It is a time where the consequences of selfishness are less severe than they will be in the real world.
University is a unique environment where ideas and perspectives are pursued for their own intrinsic value. To put it in no uncertain terms: Staying with your high school sweetheart is holding you back.
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